You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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