My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Randomize
