i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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