I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
