Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
