So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
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