and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Randomize
