The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
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