I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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