where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
Where is the hickey?
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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