I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
