Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Randomize