"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Randomize
