I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize