Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
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