we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize