Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Randomize
