Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
