like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
