I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
