I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
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