You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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