just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize