using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
