I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Randomize
