Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
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