hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
