I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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