We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
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