yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Well I just put wine in my tea
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
Randomize
