I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
