Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
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