drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
