I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
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