I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Randomize
