how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
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