So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Randomize
