I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Randomize
