super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
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