He is such a slut. More and more my type.
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
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