But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize