All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
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