brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
Randomize
