She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize