Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
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