Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
