Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Randomize
