whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
My pussy is not your playground.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Randomize