your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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