do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Randomize
