The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Why are your pants in the freezer?
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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