We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize